3.24 - Goodbye Love
I sit at a table watching as other vampires enter the room,
it’s a slow process. This isn’t like any prom or black tie even that I’ve ever
been to. For some reason I expected a meal to be served. Then I remembered most
vampires can’t eat food like Adze and Dhampir. It makes sense they would just
sip fancy blood at one of these events. Food would be for the help, and they
don’t really care much for the help. They brand us, use us and discard us at
their own leisure. Destiny makes her way back in the room and I instantly look
away. She can find me, if she even cares. I’m not going to keep chasing after
her just so I can be used and discarded.
“Get what you came for,” I ask coldly.
“Not really, but I got close. We should dance before we go,”
she says like there’s nothing wrong.
My mom used to make my siblings and I take turn slow dancing
with her when dad would get home from work late or be too tired to dance. I
take the lead here and she seems surprised, probably expecting me to keep
following like a sick puppy. The song comes to an end, but she pulls me closer
as the band starts to play again. I avoid looking in her eyes and just dance
the steps.
“What’s bothering you,” she asks me as we slow dance.
“Are you using me,” I ask her in response.
“What?”
“All the other people here. They’re all doctors, lawyers, a
few politicians, bankers and so on. The vampires use them for whatever they
want. Are you using me?”
“Why would you think I’m using you?”
“Because everyone else here is being used as a tool, and
they’re just okay with it, but I’m not.”
“Who told you that,” I can hear anger in her voice.
“Look around you, nobody had to tell me.”
“We’re leaving,” she cuts the dance short.
As she keeps her fake smile, I exit behind her. Not because
I’m doing what I’m supposed to or because I’m afraid of being left alone with
dozens of vampires. I’m following because I want answers. She is using me,
that’s why she wouldn’t say it. I want it to come straight from her mouth. I
follow her right into our waiting limousine.
“I told you be on guard in there. Didn’t I,” she speaks to
me like a child.
“You see I didn’t get eaten up right?”
“But you let them get in your head.”
“No, I let you get into my head.”
“How did I use you? Tell me how I used you,” she demands as
she pushes me.
“You’ve sent me out to run errands for you, I tracked down
that vampire’s son for him. I missed work because you wanted to go out hunting
and need an assistant,” I start to list all the tings. “Oh wait, I forgot. I
almost got raped because you used me as bait for a Succubus.”
“This all started because you got knocked out stalking me at
a night club. I took you home so nobody would find you in a dark alley covered
in blood. That was my first mistake, bringing home a stray, because they get
attached. Trust me, I know.” She puts her hand over my mouth before I can
respond. “My second mistake, not making you disappear when you started showing
up at my place unexpectedly. Mistake number three was assuming we were friends,
because friends do things to help each other out, so yeah, you ran some errands
for me and I taught you to meditate. When’s the last time you fell on the floor
having an anxiety attack? Did you help me find that vampire’s son? Not really,
you just lied to him. I was going to work that case anyway; you chose to tag
along. I didn’t ask you to find anyone, you got your computer out and went
super hacker all on your own. You told me you hated your job, I thought you
would want a break. Sorry for trying to entertain you. As for the Succubus? I
would have never let you get hurt. Did I ever ask you for money? Jewelry?
Anything but a little time? So, tell me, how am I using you?”
“I’m sorry,” is all I can think to answer after a few blocks
of silence.
“You’re sorry?”
“Yes, I’m sorry. Really sorry. You told me be on guard, and
I let them get in my head. I let them make me doubt you. They just got to
showing their brands and saying all the things the vampires used them for. I
thought I was going to be one of them. A thrall, or familiar.”
“I’m sorry too. I’m sorry I let a stalker into my fucking
life. I’m sorry I let you get close to me. I’m sorry I thought we had a good
thing going. I’m sorry, I trusted you enough to show you the world I live in.
You’re a sorry ass excuse for a man, and I’m sorry I didn’t see that. I’m sorry
I thought we made a good team.”
Destiny starts tearing at the bottom of her dress, until all
the frills are gone and it looks more like a blouse. I didn’t know she was
wearing basketball shorts underneath, that’s just like her. She pulls a pair of
sneakers from her purse and turns her head, unable to look at me. In the
moment, I feel like I might have just gotten dumped. I’ve never been in a
relationship before, and we didn’t make it official. I see her as my
girlfriend, but not my real girlfriend; not that’s she’s mine either,
especially not now or ever.
“Driver, let me out here,” she knocks on the window.
“Please, don’t go,” I call out as she leaves the limo and
takes off running.
I know I’ll never catch her, so I don’t even give chase. I just wait for the limo to drop me off at home and think about how I screwed this up. One of the few good things I’ve had in my life, and I ruined it because I let some vampire groupies get in my head. I was on guard, ready for a fight. I just didn’t think the fight would be with the love of my life.
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